Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
