I accidentally burped into my bong.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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