how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
