the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize
