i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
