weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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