i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
