No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
