Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i think my mom watched the whole time
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
He did a backflip because drugs
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