i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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