Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
either way he was missing a nipple.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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