last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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