Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
