I wanna passion pit in your ass
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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