i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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