Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
