I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize