Dual....:-)
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
