No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
