ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
