There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Come share oat with me in your robe
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
COCAINE IS GR8
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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