During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
