omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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