Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I just want nice things and good sex
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
