I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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