i barfeds in our rink
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
