yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Randomize