Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
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