Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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