i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
