her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Randomize
