**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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