Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
