Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Randomize