just tell him i said nine months
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
