so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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