from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sent this text using only my big toe
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
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