ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
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