your parents love me but you hate me
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
