Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
