You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
She even gives head with a lisp.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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