I'm going to rape someone's good day.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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