I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
