You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
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Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
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Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
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