too bad you live with your parents still
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
