big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
