I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
The air was thick with penises
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
