dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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