think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
