Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
